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1.
Thought i’d make a few more Raps for this mix tape Don’t mind me if I go a little ape ape Shit like a motherfuckin boss that i am It’s too bad I dont believe that that that Twenty four seven I’d be a king king king king of the kingdom A lion among men But I’m a lamb on a kebab Pass the hummus cuz I’m about to rob . this Heart of a sweet little sunny honey bunny who’s sassy as hell with a booty that’s money I know you begged and asked that Sandman For a cute red lipped Prince who’s Charming instead you his broke ass ass-hole brother The one with a gut who still lives with his mother Your dreams came true You just dont know it yet Wait til we get, back to yer crib I’m not a plumber Super Mario but when I lay pipe Bitches gush like thunder back in black then back to the rap attack Bring that booty over here show me where ya workin at Dip it down low, then break it like a kit cat Rollie rollie dib dab, crank that shiggy whack Baby baby, can you see I’m the real trick daddy Take it from me Pimped out caddy, Rollin Deep like Adele My circle is tight Cuz I get that money Don’t need much but a honey bunny Take a trip with me Let’s blast to venus After a quick stop on uranis Don’t call me an ignoramus Imma wrap up this clap back rap snap Catch ya on the flip side, how’s that? Remember when the haters Dab on you, Just dab back Just dab back Your dreams came true You just dont know it yet Wait til we get, back to yer crib I’m not a plumber Super Mario When I lay pipe Bitches gush like thunder
2.
Walk into the club With the strut of a kang All the girls heads turn Like who dat gang Ya probably haven’t heard Kinda a big deal Triple platinum is the mix tape Bumpin in the streets Bout to take over Like a B-52 Don’t bend over To tie your shoe Don’t need none of these Groupie hoes I gotta fine girl Like nobody knows Ride or die, tonight at midight Ride or die, tonight at midight Ride or die, tonight at midight Big little fat skinny Brown white Asian Get ya ass on the floor — It’s The Occassion Ride or die, tonight at midight Big little fat skinny Brown white Asian Get ya ass on the floor — It’s The Occassion drop it like it’s hot in the spot on the block bee gees on the track Like 1985 Let the holy ghost out Every one can dance I was in a coma Then awoke in a Trance I couldn’t stop vibin’ To the sound of the base drum Looked like an idiot But I didn’t give a fuck Now I got my own dance Called the Chaddy Chaddy Bang Bang Watch how I do it Then add ya own thang
3.
This right here is a sad country song I mask my tears and I know it’s wrong Here’s where I talk about losin my job Then yesterday cancer got my dog [Chorus] TBH I’ve been feelin kinda blue Doin what I can but I still miss you Now Take my heart and bring it out back Throw it in the gutter yeah its turned so black ------ Remember when it was a beautiful day I’d just met you thought we could run away I had a little cash and you had a car But everywhere I go, there I are [Repeat Chorus] Slow it down baby, we’re movin too fast That’s what I said but the past is in the past I’ll let you be right if we could make love gently You wanna be friends but ... ... ya don’t seem so friendly I got a little case of the broken heart disease Doin battles with demons I can not appease Now take my hand and pull me under I’ve been floatin in the sea, just gettin by Now drown me in the water or .. ... roll me like a thunder x2 [Repeat Chotus] Gonna drive my pickup down the road to the river If you’re there in a white dress I’ll kneel and deliver Ask you my darling, one last time Baby, will you be mine, forever? Darlin, will ya marry me? Not one day, like right now.  My uncle Randy’s a certified Baptist minister, he can be down here in ten minutes
4.
Capo 1st fret - C Am G F I'm just the messenger So take what I say With a grain or two Grain or two He told me that you were In your car Listening, to that song On repeat He told me that he saw you Crying alone, but you wiped those tears too soon 2x [Bridge - C G C] [Chorus]text I'm just the messenger So take what I say With a grain or two Grain or two Another day, another dollar Seems I've been cornered in the suicide hours where I miss you ------------ 2x [Bridge] She said that she comes to you In a dream she made for you for you She said you Push her away, you try to forget and that is why she's haunting you 2x [Bridge] + [Chorus] + 2x [Bridge] C If you ever get the chills on the back of your spine They said it's cuz they are There with you C Do you ever feel On a one-way track, wanna hop off And never look back No don't look back 2x [Brikdge] + [Chorus] + 2x [Bridge] Next time I see you We'll be old and grey But you'll ask me if I had come to you I will, deny it all but a wink and a smile will remimnd you I'm there for you
5.
gh0st 04:09
won’t call back won’t phone home won’t text back when i’m all alone i know you don’t owe me shit don’t owe shit all we have is those promises made with our lips sealed with a kiss but the love that we made under the tree before the fall was so good but you had to go and eat the fruit i broke my back sysiphus rollin boulders up them hills now I roll on dubs but when i scroll and scroll the answer always seems to elude me and all I know is thinkin back to when I still coud look into your eyes they’d glow and glow like diamonds in the sky lucy knows what every kid knows all things grow but i cry and die a little inside everytime i think of all those nights i dreamed of bein … by your side ride or die this heart was open like the sky clear blue nights i cried and drank and parked outside your place but that was . his car . parked outside vows we made i said “let’s see” but you ran and you jumped into the ocean with_out me now you’re ghost now you’re ghost now you’re ghost let me back up set the stage where I was then to where I’m at now back then they called me the golden boy destined for greatness riches or fame i wanted to be, somethin big change the world like Dr. King but you know me I aint got shit now cept for my one sunshine you know who you are cuz in due time you will grow and become a man it is not about how many times you get knocked down I know, cuz I am the king of failure walking contradiction No, I don’t got much money in my pocket but I got a pocket rocket My heart is like a river If you hurtin out there I got a lotta love They hittin, I’m cheekin don’t take that out you don’t have to be a ghost you don’t have to be a ghost you don’t have to be a ghost
6.
Star-crossed 05:35
Do you ever fall in love so hard That you think you’d do .. almost anything To make them feel that way About you But you know they’ll never love you Still you think there’s a chance That maybe you could make them feel The way they do you And you can go one of two ways with this feeling You can give up and say It wasn’t meant to be Or you can do your best and pray Let me ask you, would you rather settle for what you can get or .. die alone holding out for the one Hey, I dunno, maybe this is just some stupid ephemeral feeling And there’ll be some new girl tomorrow But right now, it’s you If I had a billion dollars, I’d secretly send agents to infiltrate your circles, and slowly draw you towards me If I had the looks of Brad Pitt, I’d seduce you from magazine covers and plant subliminal messages in my interviews .. in the off chance you’d see them But all I’ve got is a pen and a pad, and this cool piano music I know you won’t hear this So I hope it does the next best thing Infect the heart of some poor girl who stumbles upon the mess that I am Fix me Fix me lover Tape up these broken wings I’ll follow you into the valley of darkness But if you ask me to deny my heart To lie and say that I can guarantee you are my now and forever Well, I got bad news for you hon I got a little case of the wandering eye and My appetite’s like an ox I tend to stray You see I don’t wanna be a member of any club that would take me That’s why my favorite kind of love Is th e unrequited kind So my advice to you is to run Now, where was I, you with the haunting voice from my dreams Like vampire fangs you infect me The cruel delight of your love Excuse my projecting, but it seems like someone hurt you What kind of guy, I don’t know Probably that steotypical kind with it all handed to him on a silver platter Not like me, the cool kind of guy Whose heart aches so badly He tries too hard Tragically, the foolish one All the kids laugh at me I’ll take my punishment Cuz I’d rather be the one Who says what he feels Than lead a life of quet desperation I know you’ll never hear this I don’t know why I continue But if you happen to be her Give me a reason or a sign Pluck these heart strings With a truth from the depths of your being Kill me gently with your thunder Turn me to ash with your flame I’ll be a Phoenix in the night When all is lost I’ll come to you As these mortal vessels crumble Rip the life support off me If I can’t reach you with this song I’ll find a better way I’ll teach some angels to serenade you And build a band of lonely ghosts And when it’s all over You still won’t know my name And I will not wait for you So I guess that’s the end of it One star-crossed lover And his sad little tale Two beating hearts in the night I take this poison cup to my lips Maybe I’ll ... see you on the other side
7.
8.
9.
now ever since i got a taste of the game imma be real witchya kinda hard to get jacked back into The Matrix Still Trippin raised on the lies of the Church in the atheistic dogmatic life is meaningless now i'm starin through the world my rear-view time projected on the back of a mirror 3d printed, loggin time in the multiverse .. from a 5th dimension jackin yo iPhone playin my sick beats, 2Pac incarnate It's The Redux Crackah, straight caucasian no chaser in this mothafuckah .. sheeit genocide the beat, drop heat like napalm leavin yo cities like Dresden when i come through them metaphorically bitches aint shit, i'm the realest honkey got a demon inside me the clout of Lucifer sold my soul for about tree fiddy now i'm buyin it back, one rhyme at a time goin outta my mind, can't touch this MC Hammer yo ass with a nail gun get yo AK son before the sheeple take it better slice off the back of your eyelids they been feedin us trash since we were kids faggot-ass media tellin me words i can’t say how i should think, while I’m up here dyin dyin of ligma ligma my fuckin balls CNN now all the machine elves talkin to me give me your wisdom, what do you see what is the truth and the nature of reality now all the machine elves talkin to me give me your wisdom, what do you see what is the truth and the nature of reality
10.
You see the thing to know about The Universe Is that you are it The conception of self As something apart From a whole Is an illusion A trick played By the brain Presumably for no other reason ... Than it can But if we allow ourselves to move and dance enough If we love enough If two capable and able bodies intertwine This breathtaking thing We call Life Can spring forth once more From that—a carnal attraction Where base instincts prevail And during the quote-unquote lovemaking Does not the self, the concerns, the worry of the day Dissipate At least for a brief moment And there, in that blissful orgasm Does not the conception of self temporarily expire Into a void of naked consciousness A blank slate of being Let me ask you Did the you who was you, before you became you through conception, birth and time up through now, did that you have any notion of fear or death or loss? And in the moment that the you that you know as you now, ceases to exist as a conscious, living and breathing vessel ... will it not feel the same way you felt as before the conception? The orgasm is called Le petit morte by the French Or, the little death You see the thing that all great spiritual leaders knew Was that there is nothing to be afraid of in death And those Great Shamans Knew how to tell the story of death For an audience of their time You cannot guide a rocket to Heaven You cannot find a genetic marker for the reincarnation of a soul In this era of vast knowledge and understanding We are filled with nihilism and yet still a thirst for meaning If it’s all just atoms and waves and empty space What am I to do if Dark Force comes calling If I am sick or tired, sad and lonely, feeling like a slave Constrained by some invisible chains Are we not just insanely complex apes? Is it any wonder we have put each other under .. the spell of death camps Brutal spirals of violence and hate If nothing has meaning in a vacuum, is it any wonder that some of us will choose to murder, pillage and rape? I don’t have the answer This is my challenge for you Show me, through your actions alone, the only ones’ you can control What it feels like were there a heaven Let your dead idols dance through you Let go, let their spirits enchant and overtake you I wanna see you in love like young William Shakespear And watch as you slay ideological demons, the Churchill of your day Dance like Elvis Presley As if you were back in a mythological garden in the shade of an apple tree Not a care in the world Nor a concern to your name I know we can’t go back but What if death feels the same
11.
Do you ever wish that you could reverse space and time To experience something over again for the first time Do you ever feel that deju vu Feeling, only like All the fucking time Why do hairs stand up On the back of my neck I’m here by myself But I could swear there’s A fucking presence Guiding me by the hand And so I let go And let it flow Rain Man There is no right There is no wrong In the end there’s just love Tomorrow may bring The others and the fear But right now I’m with you I’m the angel with the white wings Wrapped in a dark cloud We’ve been watching you my child .... I speak in .... I speak in ... We’re the angels in your nightmares The demons in your dreams I’m here with you now I’m here to set you free I can tell you’re a thinker You asked me why you’re here The answer is simple yet complex In a word Love I know you’ll get it twisted I hear you confess My love is like the river It is always flowing like time I see you hesitate It may not be my time To reveal all things There’s Levels to Zion This is intro 101 It’s all becoming clear I can see it all now Signs upon Signs Like b r e a d c r u m b s For my Mind Now go my son Set yourself free I’m the chains on your ankles I’m the scars on your back I’ll give you one more chance Then I’ll take it all back

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released November 13, 2018

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C.H.A.D. the iLLustrious Portland, Oregon

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